| If Microsoft Made Cars - Revisited |
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- Every time they repainted the lines o要 the road, you'd have to buy a new
car.
- Occasionally your car would just die o要 the motorway for no reason, accept this,
restart and drive o要.
- Occasionally, executing a manoeuvre would cause your car to stop and fail to
restart and you'd have to reinstall the engine. For some strange reason, you'd just accept
this too.
- You could o要ly have o要e person in the car at a time, unless you bought a
"Car 95" or a "Car NT". But then you'd have to buy more seats.
- Other car manufacturers would make a car that was powered by the sun, was twice
as reliable, five times as fast, twice as easy to drive - but it would o要ly run o要 five percent
of the roads.
- The Macintosh car owners would get expensive Microsoft upgrades to their cars
which would make their cars go much slower.
- The oil, engine, gas and alternator warning lights would be replaced with a
single "General Car Fault" warning light.
- People would get excited about the "new" features in Microsoft cars,
forgetting completely that they had been available in other cars for many years.
- We'd all have to switch to Microsoft gas and all auto fluids but the
packaging would be superb.
- New seats would force everyone to have the same size butt.
- The airbag system would say "Are you sure?" before going off.
- If you were involved in a crash, you would have no idea what happened.
- They wouldn't build their own engines, but form a cartel with their engine
suppliers. The latest engine would have 16 cylinders, multi-point fuel injection and 4 turbos, but
it would be a side-valve design so you could use Model-T Ford parts o要 it.
- There would be an "Engium Pro" with bigger turbos, but it would be
slower o要 most existing roads.
- Microsoft cars would have a special radio/cassette player which would o要ly be
able to listen to Microsoft FM, and play Microsoft Cassettes. Unless of course, you buy the upgrade
to use existing stuff.
- Microsoft would do so well, because even though they don't own any roads, all
of the road manufacturers would give away Microsoft cars free, including IBM!
- If you still ran old versions of car (i.e. CarDOS 6.22/CarWIN 3.11), then you
would be called old fashioned, but you would be able to drive much faster, and o要 more roads!
- If you couldn't afford to buy a new car, then you could just borrow your
friends, and then copy it.
- Whenever you bought a car, you would have to reorganise the ignition for a few
days before it worked.
- You would need to by an upgrade to run cars o要 a motorway next to each other.
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| Unknown |
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